Memory Flags

Last weekend we were invited to The Sharing Place, a grief center for children, to make "Memory Flags". It was really neat to see the kids talking and sharing with other kids while working on such a neat project. We heard other people's experiences that made us feel very grateful for the ways we have been blessed.





We hung them up loud and proud.

Then we went to visit Joy's grave and it was raining so hard. I really had my heart set on a little ceremony type thing. I envisioned the cousins putting a butterfly in the ground and sharing a memory. Whatever! They were very good sports to stand out in the rain.


Sunday afternoon it was gorgeous. My parents, all my siblings, and I went to the cemetery to meet my grandma, aunts and uncles, and cousins who were gathering at my grandpa's grave. (He is buried in the same cemetery as Joy.) I was overwhelmed at the sight of so many people putting flowers on the graves. It was amazing to see so much love and joy as people were honoring their loved ones. I was really touched by the sight. My feelings of Memorial Day are forever changed.

Motherhood

Today my thoughts turn to:

My mother: such a love and support to not only me but also my children. How lucky we are to live close. I'm pretty sure I would still be lying on my couch if she didn't show up regularly.

My mother-in-law: whom I love very much. She shared my grief like no other could. She (and grandpa) was the last person on earth to love and hold my little Joy.

My friend: who lost her mother when she was only sixteen. Losing my mother at that tender age would have been more than I could bear.

My friend: who is raising the children of another mother. I know mom Michelle is proud of the great job she is doing helping these girls reach their full potential as daughters of God.

My heart aches for those whose desire to be a mother is greater than any other. I'm sure this day is hard and I pray for you.

There is no greater joy than being a mother.

Neighbors

One of the dads in my neighborhood is extremely ill and has been in the hospital for over a week. So for family night our neighbors got together and did a service project for the family. We did all their yard work. Partway though it occurred to me that 3 months ago, this same group was shoveling snow and cleaning my entire house while we were making our way home after hearing the news about Joy.
I loved being able to payback a little bit of the kindness that has been shown to us.
We live in THE BEST neighborhood!!!

Who am I really?

I am an iphone loving, shower singing, primary chorister, soccer mom most often dressed in purple.
Aren't I?
I am a wife, daughter, sister, aunt and mother of five (so far:).
Aren't I?
I am a friend, niece, cousin and granddaughter.
Aren't I?

What is my purpose? What tasks were foreordained for me to accomplish on this earth? Am I doing them?

What was Joy's purpose? To bring our family joy? To gain a body and get back to her job on the other side?
In some ways it is a blessing to know that one of my children made it. Joseph Smith said (as my husband tearfully taught in EQ today), "that all children who die before they arrive at the years of accountability are saved in the celestial kingdom of heaven."

I watch my daughter bear her testimony, so much older and wiser than 11 years. What greatness is she destined for?
Am I doing enough to guide her? Will she fulfill her purpose regardless of my mistakes as a parent?

Each one of my children has a divine mission. I am sure of it. How do I help them along the journey of life?

There are so many things in this life that don't really matter (don't you dare be thinking an iphone!!!). What does matter? The relationships we have are eternal. Be kind. Be loving. Serve others. Build the kingdom.
It is my hope and prayer that we can all "make it." Knowing that Joy is waiting is a huge incentive to be as righteous as we can be so that we can be with her again.